I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Randomize
