while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
