I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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