I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Randomize
