found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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