i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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