i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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