i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
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