The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
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