So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Randomize
