Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
