$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
