I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I AM VODKA MAN
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
