Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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