She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
