Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Randomize
