I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Randomize