i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
We need to rekindle our bromance
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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