But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
