I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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