They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize