3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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