If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
