So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
