he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
