I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Randomize