dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize