You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
