Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Help. Why am I so naked?
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