Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
