I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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