sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Just fell off a train. Bad.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize