Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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