yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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