i wish my penis had a tongue
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
