"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
