So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
