I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
