it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
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