And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
