your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
