and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize