i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
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