Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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