it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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