I think I am morally bankrupt
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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