so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
the liver wants what the liver wants
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
