We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize