Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
wat bout pragnant strippers??
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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