remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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